I’m exhausted. I just said to my kitten Max, “Behave yourself. Go to your room!” (His room is a special pet bed that has a dome over it.)
Max has two speeds: “Berserker and off (Sleep)!” He cycles through that at least 7 times a day.
Perhaps, you’ve had similar experiences. You are running, running through your day.
Often, I am supporting my elderly parents through their cycle of doctor/therapy appointments—get groceries—and more. Plus, my other responsibilities.
I need to slow down.
Do you feel you need to catch your breath?
Consider these words of the Goddess.
“Keep pure your highest ideals. Strive ever towards it. Let none stop you or turn you aside.” – The Goddess speaking in The Charge of the Goddess, written by Doreen Valiente
The Goddess wants to support you in expressing your divinity.
Consider this breath ritual.
The Goddess Breath Ritual
Breathe in as you recite in your mind: “Goddess” Breathe out as you recite in your mind: “Stress Away.”
Do this cycle three times. (Yes, 3 is a sacred number.)
I was scared. I couldn’t believe it! My precious kitten, Max, had worked the cat carrier open. His head was poking out of the carrier. At the top. The opening was strangling him! His meow was a scream! And I was driving my car on the freeway!
I pulled off to the freeway shoulder. I leaned over to the seat on my right. I had buckled the seat belt over Max’s cat carrier. I got the top open a bit—and released Max’s head. I moved the zippers around. Finally, he was safe. The other cars on the freeway raced by at 70 miles per hour.
Eventually, we made it home.
I thank the Goddess that I avoided an emotional meltdown and did what was necessary to save Max. And to keep us both safe on the freeway with cars whizzing by.
The Wiccan Rede came to mind.
“Mind the Three-fold Laws you should, three times bad and three times good,” – The Wiccan Rede (in several published long form versions)
Some time ago, I was in a discussion, and an acquaintance said, “I’m concerned about The Three-fold Law. Could I make a mistake and get hit with three times the trouble?”
A short form of The Wiccan Rede reads as “An ye harm none, do what ye will.”
As I take a breath and settle into my gratitude for the safety of Max–my kitten–and me, I realize that the Goddess wants us to be safe and grow.
The Goddess says,
“Keep pure your highest ideals. Strive ever towards it. Let none stop you or turn you aside.” – The Goddess speaking in The Charge of the Goddess, written by Doreen Valiente
So, when you face a surprise hard moment or scary moment, remember to call upon the Goddess.
“Just about every day, I get hit by fear of a bad future,” I said. “About what?” asked one of my spiritual elders. “Not having enough money. Losing the place where my husband and I live,” I said. “What do you want?” “I want to feel safe,” I said.
Later, I reflected on this.
First, let’s start with this question:
What do you want?
One of my husband’s friends coaches clients to have better lives.
This coach said, “Many of us are preoccupied with ‘self-preservation.’”
In my conversation with one of my spiritual elders, this idea arose: “Which self are you trying to preserve?”
Is it the ego-self? The part that’s full of fear? Is it the artist self? The part that’s all about expressing your thoughts and feelings? Is it the divine self that the God and Goddess gave you?
I have shared on this blog before my direct experience of when I first met the God and the Goddess. In Their Presence, I felt Their total love and acceptance of me. That felt completely different from how I felt every day when I was 16 years old.
As I look back upon that moment, I realize that it was a revelation. That I was loved. It did not matter what my genetically related family members were like. I have a Spiritual Family.
I recall this quote:
We ask no Heaven, we fear no Hell, Nor mourn our outcast lot, Treading the mazes of a spell By priests and men forgot.”
― Gerald B. Gardner, The Meaning of Witchcraft
We Wiccans can go beyond the “outcast lot.”
I am a 3rd Degree Wiccan Witch of the Gardnerian Tradition.
I realize that I can make an internal shift to my Divine Self. That’s my Essence as given to me by the God and Goddess, I do not have to fall into a “small self” that might want to be elsewhere.
“That perhaps is at the core of Wicca—it is a joyous union with nature. The earth is a manifestation of divine energy. Wicca’s temples are flower-splashed meadows, forests, beaches, and deserts. When a Wicca is outdoors, she or he is actually surrounded by sanctity.” – Scott Cunningham
So, when you look to preserve your Self … look to the “core of Wicca…as a joyful union with nature.”
“All who seek to know Me, know this… All your seeking and yearning will be in vain unless you understand the Mystery that if what you seek is not found within, you will never find it without.” – The Goddess speaking in The Charge of the Goddess, as written by Doreen Valiente
So, in the quest for “self-preservation,” we can make a shift to the God and Goddess—and the Essence that They put within you.
Your Essence is not the body that grows old. Your Essence is not the approval of others. Your Essence is not the fear of a bad future.
Instead… Your Essence is the Certainty that You Are One with the God and Goddess. Preserve your experience of that!
“I want to talk about loneliness,” I said to one of my editors. “That’s a big topic. It has so many elements to it,” my editor replied.
Later, I wondered, “What has the Goddess said that applies to loneliness?”
The first phrase that leapt into my thoughts was:
“Keep pure your highest ideal; strive ever towards it; let naught stop you or turn you aside.” – The Goddess speaking in The Charge of the Goddess, written by Doreen Valiente
Let’s look at “highest ideal.”
What is your highest ideal?
Have you heard about people who met their lifemate or new friends while they pursued their own hobbies or interests?Perhaps, you’ve stopped making space for hobbies or interests. Are you called to do something different now?
How can you connect with your highest ideal—where people are?
“The Goddess’s law is love unto all beings.” – The Goddess speaking in The Charge of the Goddess, written by Doreen Valiente
Where can you do good? How can you bring some form of kindness to some people? Reiza, someone I know, has a mission when she goes to work at a grocery store. She is kind to people. And several of the customers respond with smiles and kindness toward her. She has found a few new friends.
How can you hold space so you are okay with people’s differences?
I began as a Solitary Wiccan. I empathize that it can be lonely in certain areas of this world, where we cannot share our Wiccan faith.
I noticed something unusual. A friend, Mason, has a friendship with someone who is on the opposite end of politics. These friends talk about everything—health, hopes, dreams … and they simply do NOT talk about politics.
They end phone calls with “Love ya, Brother.” On many things, they share common ground. Their phone calls alleviate some loneliness.
Would you find it possible to share part of your journey with someone?
Pray to the Goddes
I realize that loneliness is a complex situation for many of us. Many times, I understand that I need to turn to the Goddess for support, as I walk the path that can be tough.
Here is a prayer you can use.
Goddess, Support me in times I feel lonely. Show me how to expand my social circle. Bring good people into my life. So Mote It Be.
“I don’t know the last time I felt relaxed,” Charice, a person in my circle, said. “I could tell you about all the times I feel anxious,” she continued.
Have you noticed that many people in several cultures use the word “productive” like it’s a beacon of hope? Also, productivity is tied to self-worth.
Is being relaxed not productive?
Someone I know, Stephanie, told me that she found a truly helpful idea when she was in turmoil, during college.
“It’s called ‘the 50-minute hour,’” she told me. The idea is: You study for 50 minutes and then do something relaxing. Perhaps take a walk outside the building.
Another friend used to draw storyboards (illustrations for making a film) when taking a break from studying for college exams related to biology and physiological psychology.
A break to relax did support productivity.
Also, it gave my friends ways to be in the world outside of a state of Rush-Rush.
Here are insights to support you in becoming a Relaxed Witch.
1. Imagine “Relaxed” as “In Tune”
If all you do is focus on the fearmongering and rage baiting of social media, you’re not in tune with nature. How can you be relaxed? Feeling anxiety and adrenaline keeps you separate from your essence as a Relaxed Witch.
Being in tune is related to self-care.
2. Identify what Self-Care is to you
Ask yourself: What do I feel is the Self-Care I need?
Here are some Self-Care ideas:
A ritual bath.
Doing your own nails.
Making a magickal cup of tea or coffee.
Do an extended grounding exercise.
Enjoy your own spa day.
What would you like to do as self-care?
3. Take a Breath
We often take our breath for granted. But it can feed our soul.
Why?
Our breath feeds our bodies. It also carries our magickal words of power.
Deep breathing helps us center ourselves and can be done anywhere we feel safe.
It can be done during our lunch break in our car, at home, or on a walk in the woods.
4. Say a prayer for Self-Care
Here is a prayer you can use.
As I breathe 1, 2, 3, Help me manage the rising tornado in me. I ask Air to calm the winds down. I ask Earth to stand my ground, Let Fire shift down low. And Water wash my anxiety just so. As I will, so mote it be!
“My sister just won’t stop for a minute to hear me out,” Milly, a new acquaintance, said.
“She has all these judgments about me and my faith. She doesn’t see me as a person. It’s like she’s talking to her projection of what she thinks I might be.”
I reflected on this.
Here are two insights that might help you.
1. You push, and they push back.
Ever try to explain your faith to someone? And, they just push back. Telling you that you’re wrong and that they know—better than you—what your spiritual path is.
Arrogant, right?
You push facts, and they push fiction. But what does the pushing get? Nothing good.
2. Invite the Gods to help you lower your “intensity.”
Have you noticed that when someone says unfair and ignorant things against you, it’s your internal “intensity” that rises?
Here is a prayer that you can use to help you lower your intensity.
I breathe in and bring in the love of the Gods. I breathe out and let go of my anxiety. I breathe in and bring in clarity. I breathe out and let go of my intensity. I breathe in calm. I breathe out and let go of my intensity. I breathe in peace within my integrity. I breathe out and let go of my intensity. May the Gods bless me. So Mote It Be
“I had to talk to some officials about my father,” my friend, Fred, said. He looked shaken. His elderly father was continuing his violent ways.
“They want me to sign some paperwork. But I don’t know what the hell my father will do next,” Fred continued. Fred’s father had attacked another resident at the facility. The police were called, and Fred’s father had to face a judge. His father was barred from that facility.
Fred was triggered. And why not? His father had physically and emotionally abused Fred as a kid. Until he left home at 17 years old.
Are you triggered now?
I have three insights for you.
1. You need steps to handle being triggered.
Every time Fred talks with his father, the conversation goes bad. So, Fred sets up a phone call with a friend to occur immediately after such a conversation. They talk a bit about the call. But better than that, they shift to talking about something good. Fred is able to make a shift in thoughts and emotions.
Do you have a pattern so you can feel better after some triggering situation?
2. Focus on doing “a shift.”
Sometimes, the way to stop emotional pain is to shift out of a worn pattern. Something triggers a person, and then they go into a negative spiral. Fred calls a friend to do a shift in thoughts and energy. You can also meditate, pray, and/or go for a walk in nature. The idea is that you avoid losing a whole day to feeling bad.
A person can get value by venting during a chosen time. My husband and I take walks together. I remember my husband saying, “I’m going to vent about the problem until we get to that traffic light. Then let’s talk about something else.” That became our signal to do a “shift.”
Do you have a pattern of making a shift?
3. Consider a “Meditative Walk” to help you release pain.
I have learned to take a certain kind of “meditative walk.” It works better with nearby trees.
As you walk you can say something like:
I thank you my friends, the trees, I thank you grass and shrubs. Help me dissipate the negative energy within me. Negative energy flows downward. Out of my feet. Into the ground. Into Mother Earth. Such energy is now harmless. I am clear. I am safe. So Mote It Be!
I felt gutted by an awful text. This person does not know me, but they showed big-time irritation. I used words like “Sorry for the inconvenience. ….. mistake …. Please let me know about …. Thank you.” But this person made a big thing out of a small situation.
Have you recently received an awful text?
I have three insights for you.
1. Avoid ruminating.
The text really bothered me. I felt the person was so irritated at me for such a small matter. I had trouble falling asleep that night because I just kept ruminating on what I could have said to make the situation better.
Do you ever pause and realize that it does not matter what you might have said? That is, some people are just twisted. They’re going to be mad at somebody—and you just happened along.
To avoid ruminating, you can run a chant in your mind. Something like: Thank you, Goddess. I’m grateful for all my blessings.” You can repeat this over and over – in your mind – and perhaps, fall asleep.
2. Do what you can—let go of the rest.
The thread of texts ended with the other person insisting that she not be bothered. The problem was one I did not create. The delivery service screwed up the address on my order.
Dealing with the other person, I just replied with “Certainly.” End of conversation.
I don’t know what was going on in this person’s life. Maybe they are having family problems. Or perhaps, they fear losing their job. Who knows?
So, I guide myself by saying, “You did your best and let go of the rest.”
3. Invite Goddess to Support You by Pouring “Clear Water” into you.
Years ago, I saw a workshop leader pour clear water into a glass cup that was befouled with inky water. The clear water went in. The inky water flowed out … until only clear water remained in the glass cup.
I did a brief meditation. I visualized myself as a vessel of water befouled with the negativity of that text. I then used a prayer to the Goddess. I invited the Goddess to pour “clear water” into me.
Prayer to the Goddess:
Dear Lady of the Moon Guide me to stay strong Pour Your loving energy like clear water into me. Have negative energy flow out through my feet Dissipating into the earth Made Harmless to all. So Mote It Be.
Some years ago, I faced the week before I was to give my first workshop. I was a wreck. Have you ever faced something that scared you, and you felt like it was coming for you—like a train with teeth?
No matter what, I was going to give that workshop. What if the attendees didn’t like the material? What if they didn’t like me giving the workshop? What if—?!
Recently, I was talking to a friend. The subjects included fear, the Goddess and what makes a good life.
I shared, “I’ve learned that even when my depression symptoms make my experiences ‘gray’, there were moments when the sun shone through. These times were when I faced fear and went forward. These were moments when I stretched, and I grew. I felt that I had, even briefly, connected with life.”
She said, “Yeah, I see that. But those moments, when I need courage, are still tough.”
A Prayer for When You Need Courage
Have you been in situations when you felt, “If only I had some confidence—some courage”?
Prayer for Courage
Eyes clenched in fear, I want to feel You Near. Goddess show me the light, Lend me some of Your might. Eyes once shut now opened wide, To see You, Goddess, on my side. Worry go, and fade away, Confidence now—Goddess have Your say. As I So Will, So Mote It Be.
May this prayer support you as you engage life with courage and hope.
“My whole household is down with the flu. Except me. Well, I’m starting to cough. I don’t how much longer I can take the pressure,” she said.
Saying “Don’t worry” won’t do Zoe any good at this moment.
When’s the last time you have been seriously worried? Is it happening now?
I’ve noticed that worry gets more intense about things we really cannot control.
What can you do?
We, Wiccans, have an advantage: We can do an empowering ritual.
The “Let Go” Meditation/Ritual
What you will need:
One white candle
Banishing oil or extra virgin olive oil
Banishing incense or your favorite scent
Ritual tools
Cakes and wine
This is a truly simple candle ritual you can do to get some relief from worry.
Cast circle in the usual manner.
Consecrate and charge your candle with your holy water and your incense. Dress your candle with your oil.
Start belly-breathing (taking big breaths in and out—slowly) and light the candle.
Envision all your worry and fretting going into the candle’s flame. That is, envision all your worry as a black smoke flowing out of your mouth with each breath out. The flame draws all the black smoke.
Say: In this moment,
I let go. Goddess take this from me.
God strengthen me.
So mote it be.
Continue your meditation on the candle, breathing out all your worries as the black smoke.
When you’re done, thank the God and Goddess for Their support. Let the rest of the candle burn out.
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