husband

How to Communicate Something Tough and Avoid Somebody Shutting Down (a Witch’s Perspective)

/ Moonwater / 2 Comments

“My husband just shuts down,” my friend, Lisa, said. “I can’t get him to correct what he’s doing.”

Later, I had a thought based on some Wiccan and magick ideas.

Here are three insights.

1. Carefully choose words, and you wield energy.

“Magic isn’t the empty parroting of words and actions; it is an involved, emotionally charged experience in which the words and actions are used as focal points or keys to unlock the power that we all possess.” –  Scott Cunningham

You have the power to encourage or shut down a person.

Notice this difference:

  • Option One: “When are you going to listen to me? You just don’t care.”
  • Option Two: “Hey, thanks for clearing the filter for the sink.” (The other person smiles. Then you add something like…) Oh, I had another idea. Is this an okay time to talk “logistics”?

As Scott wrote: “words and actions are used as focal points or keys to unlock the power that we all possess.”

2. You influence certain people in ways more than you know.

If someone cares about you, they’d like to succeed in doing something good for you.

I remember inadvertently overhearing two spouses, “Sam and Janet.”
Sam looked back at Janet to see if Sam’s washing her car had made Janet happier.
No. She just made another request.

Sam did NOT get a moment of success at trying to please her.

It’s about giving your loved one some space to feel good.

In my own life, I need to take care of myself. And that’s tough when I’ve lost sleep. So sometimes, I schedule a nap.

I come back with renewed energy.

My husband and I enjoy a better interaction after that.

“On waking in the morning, try to make your first words pleasant, for this brings good fortune for the entire day.” – Scott Cunningham

3. Ask, in prayer, that the Goddess guide your words

Here is a prayer you can use.

Goddess,
Guide my words that they may comfort others,
Help me hold my tongue when the words are sharp.
Support me to take care of myself, mind and body.
May I be grateful for every blessing.
So Mote It Be

As witches, we notice the value of being flexible like the willow tree. May we meditate, conduct ritual, and pray to maintain our flexibility.

And remember this: 

“That perhaps is at the core of Wicca–it is a joyous union with nature. The earth is a manifestation of divine energy. Wicca’s temples are flower-splashed meadows, forests, beaches, and deserts.” – Scott Cunningham

May these insights support your path.

Blessed Be,
Moonwater

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Fortifying Your Boundaries (a Witch’s Perspective)

/ Moonwater / 1 Comment

“I’ve reached the end of my rope,” my friend, Rhonda, said. “I can’t bend anymore. I can’t take any more.”

I nodded.

I saw it in Rhonda’s eyes.
She knew that I understood.

That’s because she knew my story.
During my first marriage, I told my husband that we needed to have food in the house. But he didn’t care. He took care of himself by buying fast food. And overspending on his own video games.

That, plus more details, inspired me to go for a real boundary of “I’m not going to live like this.” I filed for divorce. One of my best decisions.

I have insights for you.

1. State your boundary. Make it brief. Say, “I need this.”

    During my first marriage, I would try to “make my case.”
    He did not listen. He did not care.
    Instead, I’ve learned to say, “I need this walkway clear.”

    That’s the full thought.

    I don’t need to plead and have to justify what I need.

    I have worth as a human being. The Gods placed divinity within me. And within you.

    “Live your earthly life fully, but try to see the spiritual aspects of your activities as well. Remember—the physical and spiritual are but reflections of each other.” – Scott Cunningham

    2. Realize that your boundary mirrors boundaries in nature.

    “We cannot and must not give love to others before we have respect and love for ourselves.” – Scott Cunningham

    Realize that the Goddess wants your well-being.

    I remember that the bark of a Redwood Tree is highly fire-resistant.

    The bark protects the tree’s core. Redwoods can survive all but the most extreme fires.

    Again, we, witches, learn from nature.

    Maintain a good and strong boundary.

    You, like the glorious Redwood Tree, are loved and valued by the God and Goddess.

    Here is a prayer you can use.

    Gods,
    Surround me with your protection,
    Like the mother bear who protects her young,
    Or the lion who protects his pride.
    Here me now, and surround me with
    your protection on this Day/Night!
    So Mote It Be!

    May these insights support you on your path.

    Blessed Be,
    Moonwater

    Enroll in my Online Course Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magick At Udemy.com

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    Burst through the “It’s Good for You” Wall (a Witch’s Perspective)

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    “What’s good for you—that’s Wicca—that you don’t do?” my friend, Margarette, said.
    “Meditate more often,” I said.
    “What holds you back?”
    “It’s a freakin’ cliché. I have no time in the morning. I’m too tired at the end of the day. And, I spend my day mostly taking care of my parents (often). And one diabetic cat,” I said, my shoulders drooping.
    Margarette nodded. She looked sad.

    I have an insight for you.

    Attach The Good For You Action to Something You’re Already Doing

    Something good for me is to do an action that makes me feel better.

    For example, my husband massages my back every night. (Yeah, I feel lucky.)

    But I just don’t get around to massaging his back.

    I don’t feel good about not supporting the Love of My Life.

    Except, now I’m turning that around. Now, I’ll take 10 seconds to massage the trapezius muscles next to his neck when I walk past him to my workstation (in our home).

    10 seconds is better than nothing.

    He smiles and says, “Wow! You remove a lot of tension from my trapezius muscles in a short time!”

    So I’m going to walk past him anyway. I’ve just attached being kind to my husband (and I feel better) to my daily action.

    My way to add Wicca to these 10 Seconds is to say a prayer like: “God and Goddess, thank you for my sweetheart. May he feel safe in my arms and loved.”

    What would be good for you to add to your daily life?

    Here’s a helpful prayer.

    Goddess,
    Guide me to make time for
    What’s good for me,
    What’s important to me,
    What makes me smile.
    So Mote It Be.

    May this insight support your path.

    Blessed Be,
    Moonwater

    Enroll in my Online Course Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magick At Udemy.com

     Enroll in my Online Course At Udemy.com

    Spiritual Solution for Depression Relief is also an online course on Udemy.com

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    Check out my site MoonwaterSilverClaw.com  for spells and more.

    How to Face an Opponent (A Witch’s Perspective)

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    “I can’t believe it. She’s my mother. She’s supposed to be on my side,” my friend, Alicia, said.

    I nodded and listened.

    Alicia’s mother, at this time, was her opponent.

    I have insights for you.

    1. Acknowledge the nature of the opponent.

      Researchers are noting aspects of narcissists.

      “A narcissist is an extremely self-centered person who has an exaggerated sense of self-importance.” – Merriam-Webster Dictionary

      Alicia’s mother demonstrates narcissism. Perhaps, you’ve noticed that narcissists do not care, and they do not learn.

      What can Alicia do? She can guard her time and her personal energy.

      She can set her boundaries. She can, when necessary, end her phone conversations with her mother.

      Do you need to set boundaries with an opponent in your life?

      2. Face The Three-fold Law.

      The Wiccans I know believe in The Three-fold Law.

      This Law holds that what you send out returns upon you with three times the impact.

      It is a temptation to want to wield magick to punish the opponent. Whoa! Stop.

      Instead, it is better to use prayer, ritual, and meditation to strengthen yourself.

      For example, if I faced a truly tough time, I would call upon Fire energy and I would ask the God to give me strength. I would call upon the Goddess to grant me Her Warrior Spirit

      What would help you strengthen yourself?

      May these insights support your path.

      Blessed Be,
      Moonwater

      Enroll in my Online Course Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magick At Udemy.com

       Enroll in my Online Course At Udemy.com

      Spiritual Solution for Depression Relief is also an online course on Udemy.com

      Looking for gifts?

      PentagramWheel2

      See my designs at Redbubble. 

      For more of Moonwater SilverClaw, consider some of her books:

      Visit Moonwater’s Author’s Page for all her books here.

      Check out my Podcast.

      Check out my site MoonwaterSilverClaw.com  for spells and more.