Death and Grief during Yule Time

The Summer Lands Garden

Death and Grief during Yule Time

A dear friend of mine was shot at his workplace and killed last Wednesday, the 11th. I’m grieving and I’m angry because I feel his death could have been prevented.

Grieving during the holidays when everyone is supposed to be so cheerful feels especially painful. In our pain, we might even feel anger take hold. It’s unfair to be singled out for grief.

So what can you do for a person in grief? Just listen to them.

Listening to a person dealing with grief is a hard thing. It often brings up our own pain.

Listening is a gift you give to help the grieving person feel needed support. Saying what she feels can even begin her healing process.

It’s true that you can’t solve anything for the person. But you don’t need to, and you shouldn’t try. The person grieving must travel the path of healing herself.

Being there for your friend or family member is the best thing you can do. Offering a kind heart, understanding shoulder and attentive ear is the best gift you can give someone going through grief.

May all those who cross to the other side this Yule Time be blessed, and may those who are left behind be blessed as well.

So mote it be.



Moonwater SilverClaw Logo

Why Does Pain Exist

Pain Exists

Pain Exists

Why Pain Exists

People of many faiths have asked, “Why does Deity let pain exist?” I’m not talking about only one kind of pain. I am talking about all kinds of pain that we endure. From the physical pain of skinning a knee to the emotional pain of loosing a loved one.

Why do the Gods let us, no need us, to experience pain?

Simply, pain is used as a teaching tool. The Gods do not inflict pain upon us. We do it to ourselves. Not intentionally. We don’t want to skin our knees when we fall. It is the way of life.

During our lives we learn lessons; some can be painful.

Generally, the more painful the experience, the more we remember the lesson. Learning to walk and to ride a bike involves falling. Pain motivates you to learn skills and to avoid falling again. It teaches you not to fall and to stay up during the task.

Emotional pain teaches us different things. For example, if you endured childhood taunts by mean kids, you learned that words can emotionally injure a person. Hopefully, one learns to avoid cutting down other people. (Remember the Law of Three!)

What about the death of a loved one? What does that teach us? I lost a friend when he committed suicide. What did that teach me? It taught me to cherish the people around me and to feel compassion for another person.

I remember the year of my 16th birthday. I lost my dear four legged friend, Cheesy. At the veterinarian’s office, she grabbed my hand with the energy of “I’m not ready to go yet” as she slipped away. The pain of the loss of Cheesy was intense. But then, for the first time in my life, I was visited by a spirit who had passed to the other side. Cheesy gave me a sense that she was okay. Better than okay.

Without going through such pain and loss, I would not know in my heart that death is not the end.

When you lose someone important to you, you gain a whole new understanding. With the loss you can now understand love completely.

As hard and unrelenting as pain can be, we still need it to help us learn and therefore grow. Without pain, we can’t experience true compassion, trust and love.

Blessed be,

Moonwater SilverClaw