“My mom died, and the world feels twisted,” my friend Sarah said.
I listened a lot to Sarah.
I reflected on this. Life hits us hard. It’s easy to go dark and get bitter.
Instead, I direct my focus on repeatedly bringing the light back to my eyes.
How about you? Do you want to recover from the dark times?
I have three insights for you.
1. Focus on words that elevate.
Sarah felt regret. She remembered times when she just needed to have quiet time to herself, and she did not visit her mother. Her job is extreme. She had to have recovery time to avoid getting physically sick.
Something that helped was when I said, “Your Mom would like to see you keep going for your dreams.” Sarah said, “Yes. You’re right. Thank you.”
How about you? When has someone said something positive that helped you carry on?
2. Make space to “feel it all.”
When I feel pain, I remember that to feel the good feelings I need to avoid going numb. I realize it can be good to “feel it all” … sadness, joy, fear, and courage.
When you feel it all, you can let the tough feelings stay and then go.
“I [The Goddess] give knowledge of the spirit eternal, and beyond death I give peace and freedom,” The Goddess, in The Charge of the Goddess, written by Doreen Valiente
Some spiritual elders mention that when we suffer losses, it is like we suffer “little deaths.” The child becomes a teenager. The time of childhood has died, and the teen is the butterfly who carries on. Then, we transform beyond the teenager.
To grow, we learn the value of “feel it all.” Beyond sadness and suffering is peace and freedom. How? When we integrate what we learn on our path as witches.
Do you make space to “feel it all”?
3. Ask Goddess for renewal.
You can use a prayer like this.
Goddess, Guide me to renewal. Just like the Yule Time, when the God brings light, laughter, and love to the land, Help me rise again. Restore the light in my eyes. So Mote It Be.
“If I clear this floor of clutter, what do I get?” my husband asked.
“A clear floor,” I replied.
“What else?”
“My admiration.”
“That’s it,” he said.
“What?”
“The meaning. You make the meaning,” he concluded.
I reflected on this. Being a witch means a lot to me. It means that I am a child of the Goddess. It’s about being in touch with the natural world around me. …. And more ….
How about you? Where is the meaning in your life?
Here are three insights.
1. Find your best choices.
“You make me happy,” I exclaimed to my cat. He looked at me confused. Okay. So, he did not major in the English language.
Does my cat make me happy?
We could say that my interactions with my cat “set the stage” for my experience of happy feelings.
My point is that relying on external events for happiness may be a road to trouble. How? Often, we cannot control external events. But we can make choices for the small joys in life … That’s my cat!
What are the small joys in your life?
2. Witness how you make meaning.
A girl, Cheryl, is tormented by her older brother. Does she take that as a sign that everything in the world is unreliable and awful?
A different girl, Molly, is tormented by her older brother. But then she asks her parents for karate lessons. Then, she defends herself against her brother. Molly became formidable.
The same first situation. Different meanings and different actions.
How do you make meaning in your own life?
3. Let the Goddess guide you to your Higher Meaning.
You can use a prayer like this.
Goddess, Lead me to my Higher Meaning. Guide me on my path. Clear away useless distractions. So Mote it be.
When I found Wicca, it was like coming home. A whole new world opened to me. And of course, I discovered the God and the Goddess. Here is something amazing. You have privileges as a witch.
I have four insights for you.
1. You can be close to the God and Goddess
You can communicate and be close to the Gods.
Do you pray? Or do you meditate? Using these tools as a witch we can communicate with the God and Goddess. They are only your next breath away. You can say a prayer now. Something like:
“Goddess, thank You for the comfort you give me now. So Mote It Be.”
What would you like to pray about?
2. You can wield magick for your benefit and all involved.
Ever daydream about a dream job? Want to get a raise or make more money with your own business? In these situations, and more, witches can use magick for their benefit.
I have learned that a combination of magick and taking practical actions in the mundane world makes abundance happen.
What would you like to manifest? What form of spell would you like to do?
3. You can experience community.
You can have a family-by-choice. It is true we can’t choose our family by blood. But we can have a chosen family by making good decisions.
I have learned that aligning with your spiritual family and certain friends can make for strong bonds. Bonds that are more nurturing than many bonds with family by blood.
Who in your life encourages you? Do you want to devote more time to the encouragers in your life?
4. You can avoid being tossed about seeking your personal worth from the human-mundane world.
If you must seek your personal worth from any human, you’re in trouble. Why?
Because human beings have flaws. Many are so self-focused that they have no room for you. Have you ever gone to a parent or sibling for comfort and they just ignored you?
Realize that your true worth is the divinity that the God and Goddess placed within you.
Sure, you can work to accomplish something in the mundane world. But you do not have to earn your worth. You already have a divine nature. It’s something to celebrate!
When we incarnate, it’s like we put on blinders.
When you pray and meditate, you take off the blinders, even for a few moments. You connect with your real worth—your divine worth.
Do you want to add or grow your rituals of prayer or meditation?
Have you had this experience? You eat something—something good like a dessert.
Then it’s chips. Soda. Cookies. Cashews. Peanut butter M&Ms.
(Not you? Am I alone here?)
Recently, I said, “You can’t satisfy an inner need with outer stuff.”
(But I’m willing to try.)
I have three insights for you.
1. What is your inner need?
Some researchers suggest that we are 95% motivated by things in our subconscious mind.
So how do you make the subconscious stuff visible to your conscious mind?
You can meditate and ask the Gods about some of the driving factors.
But, one of the most important things is to observe your actions.
Ever open a cupboard door looking for something to eat?
You know that hunger—that no matter how much you eat—is never satisfied? Just close that cupboard door.
It’s Halloween time in the United States. Or for us witches Samhain. How do you feel when you see the green-skinned, cackling caricature of a “so-called witch”?
What does this cackling, green caricature need? Popcorn?
Chocolate? Definitely chocolate.
Let’s pull back. Away from that… What could be the inner need?
Wanting comfort.
So, how would you like to be comforted?
(I do rely on my coffee in the morning…)
2. Step on the path of “centered and whole.”
Have you attended a ritual with other witches and felt at home?
Or…
You’re a solitary witch and your personal ritual came together well. You felt calm, but also invigorated!
To get to “centered and whole” you need to push away distractions.
So, what is distracting you?
3. Ask the Goddess for clarity in the face of distractions.
To me, cookies, pastries, and other treats are a plea for comfort. What about you?
Here is a prayer you can use.
Goddess, clear my mind, Free me from the mud of distracting thoughts and feelings. Flush me clean with the spring waters of Your love. Hold me close with Your arms around me. So Mote It Be.
Oww! It felt like a loss. My fortune cookie was empty. I found no slip of paper that promised, “Your dream will definitely come true.”
Damn.
Now what?
I have three insights for you.
1. Write your own fortune.
I wrote my own fortune: “The Gods give us a great fortune including a great car.” That’s right. My husband and I need a replacement car.
I suggest that you write your own fortune. When you write that fortune, it’s like composing a simple magickal spell.
So, what “fortune” do you want?
2. Realize that you’re a co-creator with the universe.
Does the God and Goddess give you good fortune? Yes. And, you need to take action, too.
“All acts of love and pleasure are My rituals. Therefore, let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honor and humility, mirth and reverence within you.” ― The Goddess in The Charge of the Goddess, written by Doreen Valiente
What action do you need to take to move your life forward? What can make your life better?
3. Ask the Goddess for good fortune.
Here is a prayer you can use.
Goddess, Guide me to my healthy desires. Help me fulfill my destiny, Open the doors to good fortune for me. So Mote it be.
“Are you lonely?” I asked Rene, someone in my circle.
“What? Me? No, I’m all right,” she replied quickly.
She did not seem all right.
Some definitions of loneliness include: A state of mind in which the person feels “empty, alone, and unwanted.” (noted at verywellmind . com)
Let’s face this together. We, witches, can feel lonely because certain spiritual paths openly discriminate against us.
How can you strengthen yourself and rise out of loneliness?
Here are three insights:
1. Call out the idea of “being broken.”
Has this happened to you? You felt broken in some way, and you had no energy to interact with anyone…?
I have had this for many days, due to my depression symptoms. I just want to lay in bed all day and do nothing but sleep and weep.
But what I really need to do is get my butt out of bed and do stuff. Even though I don’t feel like it.
By doing something that fulfills one of my responsibilities (caring for my elderly parents and their medical appointments), I build myself up. How? I have evidence that I am taking action. I am doing good things. I am capable and worthy.
My depression symptoms call me “broken.” But my actions show evidence that I am capable.
2. Make your healing independent of another human’s approval.
I do many things to heal without others’ interference or approval. I brew Mead and wine. I knit and make soap from scratch. I also like to bake. All of these things I do for me.
Yes, it’s nice to share my art with others. I enjoy giving my works to people to appreciate. But that is independent of why I do what I do.
To me making a good brew or bars of soap is good healing. What am I healing? I am rising from the pain caused by my depression symptoms to create my art.
I like the process of creating things. I enjoy the end products, too.
I make sure to take walks and do a bit of weight training.
Are you doing something for your health and peace of mind?
3. Ask the Goddess for support for your new “first step” actions.
To alleviate loneliness, one often needs to take certain steps forward. Perhaps, you decide to attend an in-person workshop. If you’re an introvert, you may need to practice asking some questions.
Rehearsing for talking with new people takes energy.
Consider praying to the Goddess for support and new energy.
A Prayer:
Lovely Lady, Bless me with your support for good healing. Fill me with empowering energy. Guide me to prepare to meet new people. Support me as I talk with people So, I have the energy to truly listen. May You light my way in the darkness. So that I may create connections and friendships. So Mote It Be.
“Is it true that magick can heal someone permanently?” Alena, one of my friends, asked another friend.
“I helped my old therapist heal from cancer,” Nadine replied.
“With their permission?” Alenda asked.
Nadine winced. It looked like she did not specifically ask her therapist before she did the healing spell. We, witches, know that we must get permission before doing magick—even for helping another.
I have three insights about magick and healing.
1. Pause to consider what is truly healing.
I came across this comment from Rabbi Harold Kushner. This Rabbi lost his son Aaron to a rare aging disease when the boy was only 14 years old. Rabbi Harold said: “I am a more sensitive person, a more effective pastor, a more sympathetic counselor because of Aaron’s life and death than I would ever have been without it. And I would give up all those gains in a second if could have my son back.”
Rabbi Harold became a deeper and more helpful person. Perhaps, he healed some rough edges as he learned to deal with his own grief.
It can be helpful to ask in prayer or during meditation: “Goddess, what do I need to learn?” or “Goddess, where do I need to grow?”
2. Realize that “you don’t run this show.”
One of my friends, Fred, said that he wants to stay as healthy as long as possible to support his wife. But then he said, “But I don’t run this show.” By “show,” he meant his life and the universe.
One of the helpful personality traits is “openness.” We, witches, through ritual, prayer, and meditation can keep a healthy openness to explore healing—as we need it.
3. A Healing Spell
Here is a healing spell you can do.
A Candle Healing Spell
Healing can be done in many ways. You can use herbs, colors, candles, and more.
The simplest way to do healing is to light a candle for a sick person. Wiccans use two parts to the process: Dressing the candle and stating the purpose for the use of the candle.
To dress the candle means The process of putting your desire into the candle. As you clearly envision your wish, rub anointing oil (olive oil will suffice) on the candle. Spread the oil from the top of the candle to the bottom. Rubbing from the top of the candle to the bottom draws or attracts a desire to you. If you wish to repel something, for example, an illness or bad luck, you will rub from the bottom end of the candle to the top. This pushes away what you wish to repel.
For the second part, you state the purpose of using the candle. Here is an example:
“I send healing energy to (name of person).”
A quick note on ethics and magick: When doing any spell work for another person you must ask for their consent first. If you do not ask, you may be working against their will. So always ask first.
2) Take a photo of the sick person. Asperge (sprinkle with holy water) and cense (waft incense smoke around) it. Be careful with the photo, I suggest asperging it on the back so the image is not ruined. Also, asperge it very lightly.
3) Take the blue candle and asperge and cense it.
4) Dress your candle (see the discussion above).
5) Charge the candle with its task. (Send healing energy into the candle by holding it in your hands and drawing energy up through the earth, through you, and into the candle. The process of drawing energy up consists of visualizing energy (you might imagine energy strands) rising from the earth into your feet and so on.
6) Take the photo and place it on the pentagram on your altar.
7) Place the candle on the photo. Use the taper to light the candle from the working candle.
8) Look at the flame of the candle while concentrating on your desire to heal the person. Take your time with this step. This is a great time to chant any words of power (if you have written some). Remember, these words of power could be a small prayer or rhyme talking about how the person is now healed.
9) Keep focusing that energy into the flame of the candle and into the photo under it. (Focusing energy means keep concentrating on the flame and focusing your thoughts on the intention that the person is healed.)
10) You will be letting the candle burn down completely. Warning: Be sure to place it in a safe place (perhaps, in a bathtub or sink). And make sure you do not burn the photo! Use a fire-safe container for the candle to be in. Be sure to avoid leaving a candle unattended. That is, do NOT leave the room while your candle is burning down.
Many years ago, I was new to Wicca. I needed a magical name. One night, I asked Goddess to please give me a magical name. I woke up in the middle of the night—my whole body vibrating. I heard “Moonwater.” I knew instantly that was my magical name.
Would you like to find something definite in your life?
I have three insights for you.
1. Let go of a rigid pattern.
My friend, Athena, finds herself thinking about this one mean coworker after work. At a picnic, I saw an upset look come upon her face. “Are you okay?” I asked. “I’m okay now,” she replied. “What was that?”
She took in a deep breath. “Just a thought, that I’m letting flow down the stream.” That’s a powerful method. Athena decided to not let thoughts of her mean coworker interfere with our picnic with friends.
What thought do you need to just flow down the stream?
2. Connect with the element of water.
Water flows and can wash away negative energies. Ritual bathing is a good choice if you’re not feeling good. You may have extra unwanted negative energy clinging to you. When you take a ritual bath, you release yourself from such negativity.
Let water renew you.
3. Pray to the God and Goddess.
When you need the Power of Flow in your life, consider saying a prayer like this:
My virile Lord and lovely Lady, Connect me with the Element of Water. Empower me to let negative thoughts flow away Like on a stream of water. Let me embrace the sun Of Your Wisdom and Grace. So Mote It Be.
Years ago, I was part of a coven in which someone applied to be a new member. “Marvin” lived with an excess of drama. Everything was going wrong. Marvin could not be trusted to do the simplest task. He wanted to know magick because he thought it would gain him some control over his chaotic life.
On the other hand, when I first learned of Wicca, my primary feeling was that I was coming home. It was so beautiful. It was so different from the brutal and rigid religion of my parents.
I have three insights for you related to magick.
1. Discover why you want power.
Power? Really? Would you like the power to have happy moments during your day?
How about the ability to heal and quickly overcome the flu?
Some people are drawn to the practice of magick because they want something. Certain individuals want wealth or fame. Why? They think they’ll have more control.
So why do you want power? What does having skill with magick mean to you?
It is possible to use power for positive growth. Imagine the power to grow mentally and spiritually.
2. Make sure you have support.
Have you had a mentor? I have learned much from my own spiritual elders.
Mentors can alert us to pitfalls and ways to avoid them.
Mentors can guide us to be healthy in body, mind, and spirit.
Support can also come from friends and family. Good relationships create good energy.
You can support yourself with walks in nature, exercise, good nutrition, prayer, meditation, and good habits around sleep.
The Goddess and the God stand by for you, too.
3. Ask the Goddess for Her knowledge.
“I am Queen of all the witcheries.” – The Goddess speaking in The Charge of the Goddess, as written by Doreen Valiente
The Goddess knows all magick. She can help you improve with your pursuits in the Wiccan Arts.
Here is a prayer you can use:
Goddess, Guide me in learning and practicing magick – For the good of all involved. May I grow in wisdom and compassion. So Mote It Be.
GoddessHasYourBack.com 