As a Wiccan – When You’re Facing an Invisible Illness

flower
Are you dealing with an invisible illness?

If so, I’m with you. Why? Because every day I deal with asthma, dyslexia and clinical depression.

Here’s More Trouble: Beware of Those Who Shame People with Mental Illness in the Pagan Community

What do I mean by “shame people”? I’ve encountered people who told me that I do not need medication. Instead, they claim that “a certain herbal tea” will “Fix you right up.” No. That is a delusion. But what really bothered me is their self-righteous attitude that I was not “believing enough.” Now that’s what I call shaming!

I do meditate. And I take medication. I have medical doctors who help me.

I have depression and asthma—serious diseases. And it is B.S. to tell me to drink a tea or think or wish my asthma attack or depressive episode away. This is life or death!

I do magick rituals, and they help. Still, if someone says that I don’t need medication, they are deluded. Instead, we must be our own advocates as we deal with invisible illnesses.

Why do the God and Goddess let these things happen?

I believe that before this incarnation the God and Goddess helped us plan the lessons we wanted for this incarnation.

Learning lessons on this plane is about taking the direct route. Sometimes, the direct route involves trauma or mental illness. And we know this before we are incarnated.

The God and Goddess don’t want us to suffer. They want us to be happy.

They send help to us when we need it most. My husband—that is, boyfriend at the time—came into my life and encouraged me to get help in the form of therapy and medical assistance. I am so grateful to him for taking my hand and leading me to the help I desperately needed.

Why would we choose an incarnation with trauma?

I’ll share an idea: Do you really learn what touching a hot stovetop is by someone describing it to you? Or do you learn faster and understand more completely by experiencing the pain?

The same is true with the lessons of our life. We need to experience the situation to truly learn our lesson.

Then, there is the experience of real compassion. Recently, I went through a “bottom-time” (crying and feeling hopeless). My husband sat with me. He didn’t try to “cheer me up.” He rubbed my feet. I felt better the next day—Thank, Goddess!

Still, my husband knows that there is no “happy button” on me. Sometimes, we just need to sit with the pain. I deeply appreciate my husband’s real compassion and love.

I realize that we do not ask for pain today. Still, God and Goddess often help us have the experience of support when we’re suffering. Perhaps, you’ll want to do a candle ritual to remind yourself of God and Goddess’s presence in your life.

Blessed Be,
Moonwater



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Goddess Style Weight Loss: Wiccans — Happy, Healthy and Confident

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Break Free with Goddess: Wiccans – How You Can Get Free of Worry, Illness and Anxiety and Enjoy Abundance, Health and Confidence

Be a Wiccan Badass: Become More Confident and Unleash Your Inner Power

Goddess Reveals Your Enchanted Light: Peace, Prosperity, Possibility Along Your Wiccan Path

Real Magick

Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magic: How You Can Remove Blocks to Prosperity, Happiness and Inner Peace

Goddess Has Your Back

Goddess Has Your Back: How Wicca Can Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem and Make Your Life Magickal

 

The Hidden Children of the Goddess Book

The Hidden Children of the Goddess Embrace Wicca, Become Strong, Be at Peace with Yourself and the World Around You

Goddess Walks Beside You: How You Can Listen, Learn and Enjoy the Wiccan Path

Goddess Style Weight Loss: Wiccans — Happy, Healthy and Confident

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Stepping Out of the Darkness

MCU

Recently, I was called to give a speech.
Here is the text of that speech:

“She’s eight years old and she’s drowning, held underwater in a swimming pool.

Yesterday, she loved running on a hilltop in Redwood City. The grass feeling cool between her toes. Yesterday, she climbed a tree.

But today, her brother holds her down, underwater. She is drowning. And he is waiting. Waiting for her to stop moving.

What does this do to a little girl?

I can tell you. My brother finally stepped away.

But the tough times didn’t end there. My brother kept up his torture of me until I couldn’t take it anymore.

So at 8 years old, I stepped to the edge of my bunk bed. I wrapped some yarn around my neck again and again. I stepped off my bunk bed – And I hung there for a moment—until the yarn broke.

My story is about stepping OUT of the darkness.

Sure, I’ve experienced dark times, but I’ve also experienced other things.

I once turned to a friend and said, “How many depressed people does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just sit there in the dark.” [audience laughter]

I’m glad to be speaking with you today about stepping OUT of the darkness.

Along that line, I’m going to share with you the 3 Steps of Empowerment.

The First Step is Diagnosis. When I was 11, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder – another term for this is clinical depression. Clinical Depression is not just feeling the blues. It isn’t just sometimes feeling sad. It doesn’t just go away like Seasonal Affect Disorder.

Clinical Depression is like having tinnitus. That’s the condition where you have constant ringing in your ears. Except this situation is a horrible feeling of pain, sadness, and hopelessness. It can get so bad that death seems like the only way out. A friend of mine killed himself. He had clinical depression.

So Diagnosis is the First Step.

The Second Step is: The person must say, “I want help.”

I’m using the word “say” – but the situation is really about taking action. The depressed person needs to take action.

You and I cannot help a depressed person if they don’t want help. If they won’t take their meds, and if they won’t show up for therapy – there’s not much we can do.

I know that I have family members who want to find a “Happy button” on me. Well—I don’t have a Happy button on me.

Can I borrow yours? [I address an extrovert in the audience. The audience laughs.]

As I mentioned: the Second Step is when the person says, “I want help.” The depressed person has to choose it.

I wanted help. So I worked with psychiatrists and therapists. And I take appropriate medication.

The Third Step is: Maintenance.

Sometimes, I think of maintenance of my well-being as a daily fight. I have certain “weapons” to use to hold my ground against clinical depression.

First, I have a therapy animal, a cat I named Magick. I called him Magick because he makes food disappear! [audience laughter]

I love him and petting him helps me to feel better. He helps me switch to happier thoughts. I feel he takes away some of the pain.

Second, I stay active. I go out with friends when possible. I enjoy laughing with friends. I also stay active by taking daily walks with my sweetheart.

Third, I have things that I do for myself when I’m alone. Knitting and writing are great ways to help me cope.

I have shared with you 3 Steps of Empowerment that mean a lot to me.
1) Diagnosis
2) The person must say “I want help.”
3) Maintenance

And finally about that eight-year-old girl who felt no one cared … She is still inside me, but now I am a full grown woman.
I am here.
I care.
I will protect her.”


People have told me that the above is a powerful speech.

As a Wiccan, I still feel, at times, that I must protect myself.

Do you feel the same?

How can you protect yourself from those who do not care or do not understand our Pagan path?

I’ve learned that I need to face reality. To this day, my parents still do not respect my Wiccan path. They never ask me questions nor hear me out.

Part of taking care of myself is to gather with like-minded people who love me.

May you find your tribe.

Blessed Be,

Moonwater

P.S. To sign up for our E-Newsletter click here.


Looking for gifts this Yule season?

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See my designs at Redbubble. 

For more of Moonwater SilverClaw, consider some of her books:

Goddess Has Your Back

Goddess Has Your Back: How Wicca Can Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem and Make Your Life Magickal

 

 

The Hidden Children of the Goddess Book

The Hidden Children of the Goddess Embrace Wicca, Become Strong, Be at Peace with Yourself and the World Around You

 

 

Real Magick

Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magic: How You Can Remove Blocks to Prosperity, Happiness and Inner Peace

 

 

Goddess Walks Beside You: How You Can Listen, Learn and Enjoy the Wiccan Path

How Wicca Saved My Life – Confidence

Rose
Blooming against the odds.

Finding the gods was a lifesaver, literally. Before I had the gods in my life, I was a kid with huge self-esteem problems. I had made multiple suicide attempts.

When I was eight, I was so depressed about my life that I tied a string around my neck, intending to hang myself. But the gods were on my side even then. The string broke. The gods knew I had a purpose; I had work to do for them. But at the time when it happened, I thought, I’m so lame, I can’t even kill myself right! I couldn’t see it for the blessing that it was. I just fell into a deeper depression. There were other attempts, and other failures.

My childhood was filled with physical and mental torture perpetrated by my older brother –and my parents’ neglect.

Somehow I survived to my 16th year. One day, I walked into a Barnes and Noble bookstore in my hometown. That year, I heard a new word Wicca. I asked the sales clerk, “Do you have any books on Wicca?” Her eyes lit up and with great excitement she led me to a shelf and started pouring books into my arms.

That evening, alone in my room, I started to read Scott Cunningham’s book, The Solitary Practitioner. My heart filled up. I finally found my home.

Now I reveled in a new world. Soon I was meditating, and after some sessions, the Gods made contact with me.

The gods embraced me with pure love. My body filled up with their love for me. From my head it moved through my entire body, down to my fingers and toes. Happiness was so foreign to me; I had never felt this way before. But I shifted to a deep part of myself I hadn’t known and here I knew that I was one with the Gods. Forever.

The gods found me beautiful. They took pride in me.

I never knew anyone could have this much love for anyone, especially me! This epiphany was a brilliant light into my chasm of darkness and despair. Now I could start to see myself for what I really was worth.

With this knowledge, I found a new confidence in life. Once the gods opened me up and shone their loving light in me, I was transformed into love. Love for myself and for others.

The “harm none” of Wicca rang true for me. I didn’t want anyone to go through what I had endured. I wanted to treat everyone with respect, compassion and love. So I started on my path and became a Wiccan priestess.

It’s a beautiful path.

Blessed Be,

Moonwater SilverClaw