A dear friend of mine was shot at his workplace and killed last Wednesday, the 11th. I’m grieving and I’m angry because I feel his death could have been prevented.
Grieving during the holidays when everyone is supposed to be so cheerful feels especially painful. In our pain, we might even feel anger take hold. It’s unfair to be singled out for grief.
So what can you do for a person in grief? Just listen to them.
Listening to a person dealing with grief is a hard thing. It often brings up our own pain.
Listening is a gift you give to help the grieving person feel needed support. Saying what she feels can even begin her healing process.
It’s true that you can’t solve anything for the person. But you don’t need to, and you shouldn’t try. The person grieving must travel the path of healing herself.
Being there for your friend or family member is the best thing you can do. Offering a kind heart, understanding shoulder and attentive ear is the best gift you can give someone going through grief.
May all those who cross to the other side this Yule Time be blessed, and may those who are left behind be blessed as well.
How did you find the Wiccan faith? Was it through a personal connection or was it through a book or website?
Wiccans until recently were hard to find. Many followers of the path work in secret, in the shadows. Why have all the secrecy?
This secrecy was vital because throughout history and even to this present day Wiccans (and other pagans) have been and continue to be discriminated against.
Face it, we are still a minority faith in this world. Most practitioners prefer to stay in the shadows because of the possibility of retaliation and prejudice found in family, school, work, and the general public. We know too well that there are general misconceptions and fear about the Craft. So many Wiccans practice in the shadow. (After all, I call my blog and my book The Hidden Children of the Goddess.)
So how is one to find a reliable teacher while so many teachers practice in the shadows?
You need some initial education. Books can be a great way to start. Read a bunch of books and you will start to see a pattern. Your intuition will alert you to who really knows valuable material and who may be offering faulty information.
Here is a good reading list to start your path. Those of you who have been on the path for a time may want to revisit some of these books. It’s important to have a good foundation in the Craft before moving on to the more advanced practices.
Ferrar, Janet and Stewart. Eight Sabbats for Witches, Revised Edition. Phoenix Publishing, WA, 1988.
Ferrar, Janet and Stewart. The Witches’ God: Lord of the Dance. Phoenix Publishing, WA, 1989.
Ferrar, Janet and Stewart. The Witches’ Goddess: The Feminine Principle of Divinity. Phoenix Publishing, WA, 1987.
Ferrar, Stewart. What Witches Do. Robert Hale, 2010.
Fitch, Ed. A Grimoire of Shadows: Witchcraft, Paganism & Magick. Llewellyn Publications, 1996.
Frazer, James George. The Golden Bough: A Study in Magic and Religion, A New Abridgement from the 2nd and 3rd Editions. OxfordUniversityPress, USA, 2009.
Gardner, Gerald. High Magic’s Aid. Aurinia Books, 2010.
Gardner, Gerald. The Meaning of Witchcraft. Red Wheel/Weiser, 2004.
Gardner, Gerald. Witchcraft Today. Citadel, 2004.
Giles, Cynthia. The Tarot: History, Mystery, and Lore. Touchstone, 1994.
Graves, Robert. The White Goddess: A Historical Grammar of Poetic Myth, Amended and Enlarged Edition. Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 1966.
Leland, Charles G. Aradia or The Gospel Of The Witches. Kessinger Publishing LLC, 2010.
Lipp, Deborah. The Way of Four: Create Elemental Balance in Your Life. Llewellyn Publications, 2004.
Marcoux, Tom. Darkest Secrets of Spiritual Seduction Masters: How to Protect Yourself, Boost Your Psychological Immune System and Strengthen Your Spirit. Tom Marcoux Media, LLC, 2011.
McCoy, Edain. Sabbats: A Witch’s Approach to Living the Old Ways. Llewellyn Publications, 2001.
Murray, Margaret Alice. The God of the Witches. NuVision Publications, 2009.
Neal, Carl. The Magick Toolbox: The Ultimate Compendium for Choosing and Using Ritual Implements and Magickal Tools. Samuel Weiser, 2004.
Russell, Jeffrey B. and Alexander, Brooks. A History of Witchcraft: Sorcerers, Heretics & Pagans, 2nd Edition. Thames & Hudson, 2007.
Starhawk. The Spiral Dance: A Rebirth of the Ancient Religion of the Goddess: 20th Anniversary Edition. HarperOne, 1999.
Sylvan, Dianne. The Circle Within: Creating a Wiccan Spiritual Tradition. Llewellyn Publications, 2003.
Tognetti, Arlene. The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Tarot, 2nd Edition. ALPHA, 2003.
Tognetti, Arlene and Flynn, Carolyn. The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Tarot Spreads Illustrated. ALPHA, 2006.
Valiente, Doreen. An ABC of Witchcraft Past and Present. Phoenix Publishing, WA, 1988.
Valiente, Doreen. Natural Magic. Robert Hale, 1999.
Valiente, Doreen. Witchcraft for Tomorrow. Robert Hale, 1993.
Wood, Robin. Robin Wood Tarot: The Book. Robin Wood Enterprises, 1998.
Wood, Robin. When, Why … If. Robin Wood Enterprises, 1997.
Once you have read a number of books, you will have a basic familiarity with the Craft. Next, find a mentor in the particular Tradition (type) of Wicca you want to study.
The Witches’ Voice (witchvox.com) is a great place to read more articles and to network for new connections. You can find people who have taken the giant step (and risks) to be known in the community.
Observe carefully. Use your basic familiarity with the Craft and your intuition to find someone who you feel is a good match for your next steps in learning.
Each Tradition does the Craft a little differently. It’s not that one particular Tradition’s ritual is “wrong” compared to another Tradition. There are many ways of doing the same thing correctly.
How did you come to know the Craft? Let me know in the comments section. Thank you.
Have you recently had to make some choices that brought you stress?
Stress can tell us a lot. We can see what is important to us. In this way, stress can actually guide us to the secrets of our hearts. How? We wouldn’t be feeling stressed out about something if we didn’t think it is important and it’s being threatened.
Once we know what we value, we can better set our course through life.
You see, what we need is clarity.
This is where the Gods can help.
If you’re under pressure and feeling the burden of stress, you can ask the Gods for clarity.
Why is clarity so important? When you can see things clearly, you can make a plan and take appropriate action. Those two things will reduce your stress.
One of the best ways to do that is through meditation. Here is a simple meditation to ask the Gods for their guidance.
For all meditations, follow these simple guidelines.
Find a place where you will not be disturbed for the entire meditation.
Turn off the ringer of your cell phone.
Take a sitting position where your spine is straight and your feet are flat on the floor.
Dim the lights.
Asking the Gods for Guidance – The Meditation
Start by breathing in and out deeply.
With each breath in, pull in relaxation.
With each breath out, release the stresses of the day.
Visualize breathing in the light of the Gods, soothing you.
And picture that with each breath out, you’re expelling a black cloud of stress.
Keep breathing–in and out, in and out.
And as you keep breathing in and out deeply,
Notice now that the light begins to fade around you.
Slowly at first, it gets darker and darker — until you are in total darkness, and you’re feeling safe and secure in the darkness.
Then . . . a new light blooms around you, slowly at first, but gradually it gets brighter and brighter.
You see that you are in the middle of a circle of standing stones. This great henge protects you from all bad entities.
In the middle of this henge rests a large stone altar. You walk to it and sit in front of the altar.
Now you ask the Gods for their guidance.
As you sit, you notice two loving energies beside you.
One is the Goddess and the other one is the God.
You ask them for their help and they lovingly answer your request.
(Pause for a time to hear their guidance.)
Having gifted you with their guidance, they bid you farewell.
Now it’s time to return from where you came.
Notice the light starts to dim until you are in total darkness, where you feel safe and secure.
Then . . . a familiar light returns, slowly at first, but gradually it gets brighter and brighter.
Open your eyes; you are back in the room and safe.
Note: After completing your meditation, light a candle to the Gods to thank them for their guidance.
With the Gods help, you make great decisions, creating your life of happiness.
The Gods are always there to help you. All you need is to ask for their help. You can go to them for help about anything you need.
Knowing this now, what guidance would you seek from the Gods?
Perhaps you’ve noticed our new logo for this blog. It is the heron. Why this particular bird? The heron has been a representation of the Goddess for a long time. Below is the heron’s story as told by my friend Kay Pannell.
Ardea
The name Ardea Herodotus is the Linnaean classification for the heron. The Ancient Greek historian, Herodotus, wrote in the 8th Century BC. His history of the fall of Troy included this:
After the fall of Troy, Prince Aeneas traveled to the area around Rome. One of the lands he visited was the land of the Rutuli, whose capitol was Ardea and whose ruler was Turnus. Turnus had been betrothed to Livinia, daughter of a neighboring king.
Unfortunately, the king decided to give her to Aeneas instead. (You’d think after Aeneas’s brother Paris took Helen of Troy away from her husband, King Menelaus of Sparta, he’d have wised up about taking a woman away from a man with an army—but no). A war ensued between Aeneas’s fleet and Turnus’s army. During the hostilities, the city of Ardea was burned. Herodotus reported that from the ashes of the city a white bird arose that no one had seen before. It was the heron, and for ever afterward, the heron was called Ardea. When Carl Linnaeus began his classification in the 17th Century, he called the heron, Ardea Herodotus, for the story.
The word, Ardea, also translates as “earth goddess” in Greek.
Written by Kay Pannell
Thanks, Kay.
This story is here to stay. I hope you enjoyed it. Now here’s my post for this week.
How to Give Back to the Gods
How do I give back to the Gods? It’s something I think about daily. When I was younger I had no idea. But then I encountered this quote:
Your talent is God’s gift to you. What you do with it is your gift back to God. – Leo Buscaglia
This hits the mark I think. We may not thing we have much to give back but all of us has something, our talent—the gifts the Gods have given us.
When we use our unique gifts to help others, the Gods smile upon us. For this is why we were given the gifts. To make each other’s lives more enjoyable.
Using your talents doesn’t mean you have to make it a business. You don’t need to produce products or live on a demanding schedule to serve others.
Maybe you like to cook or bake. Prepare some food and take it to a friend who is sick. Or take it to an elderly woman who lives alone and on a fixed income. This will mean a lot to someone who needs something but has no other way to get it. (Be careful to ask about dietary needs and allergies to guard the person’s health.)
If you don’t cook, do you play music? Go to a children’s hospital and play for the kids. You don’t need to book gigs and have tons of followers. You’ll still make an important difference in the hospital.
Can’t think of some particular gift to share? Donate some of your time and do volunteer work for some charity. For example, I donated time at The Peninsula Humane Society. I helped with the small animals.
Now, I write this blog. This came as a surprise because of my dyslexia. But I was led to writing by the Gods themselves. It’s hard to argue with that.
But you don’t need the Gods’ intervention to tell you what to share with others. Try something. You won’t know what is a helpful activity until you experiment a little.
On Monday September 23rd, I was reminded of the importance of celebrating small victories.
Life is meant to be celebrated.
In the days before September 23rd, I was running frantically with so much to do: Getting ready for my upcoming Oct. 19th workshop (in California) and getting my first workbook completed and then available for people to purchase online (available here). I was tired.
I took a belly-flop on the couch. I expected my sweetheart to offer me at least a score of “9.2” for my maneuver.
Instead, he asked, “How are we going to celebrate?” It had been months of work on my workbook with my sweetheart editing portions of the book daily.
Celebrate? I was exhausted and I could only think of the rehearsals for my workshop and other projects with deadlines.
Still, he was right (Don’t tell him.) It’s important to pause and celebrate a little success.
Along the same lines, my sweetie writes in his daily gratitude journal–that’s where you note what you’re grateful for. Perhaps, you had a good phone call with a friend. Maybe you took a walk for exercise. He writes in his gratitude journal just before he goes to sleep each night.
It’s so easy to forget the blessings in our lives. They happen everyday. Some may be small but they are there. However, many of us only remember the things that troubled us during the day.
It’s like a stubbed toe that screams pay attention. But we miss acknowledging all the other toes that are just fine. We concentrate on that which gives us pain.
But what about the joys in our day? The cat that purrs with affection as you caress it; your partner smiles in the morning; and you hear your favorite song on the radio. How about when your loved one makes your favorite meal?
I invite you to push forward the joys and blessing of your day. Pause. Pay attention. Push the “stubbed toe” into the background.
How do we push the joys and blessings forward? Write in your gratitude journal. Then you’ll think about your day in a different way. Sometimes, I think of a day as glancing out the window and seeing two things: a pile of garbage next to a glorious rose. When you write in your gratitude journal, you’re looking at the rose.
When I write down the “roses” of my day, I’m always surprised about how many actually occurred.
How about you? How many positive things are in your life right now? You’re reading this, so your eyes are working. You’re breathing. You’re probably looking forward to something even, perhaps, a favorite TV show.
I find that consciously choosing to look at the “roses” of life helps me focus on the beauty and joy that I experience. Soon after I started this writing in my gratitude journal, I realized that I didn’t just have one rose, I really had a rose garden.
Now, you can take this a step further. In addition to remembering the roses of your life, show your gratitude. Do a simple ritual at the end of your day. After noting my blessings in my gratitude journal, I take a candle and offer it as thanks to the Gods for the blessings I enjoyed.
Tea light candles work great for this. They are small and don’t take too long to burn. This way you don’t have a candle burning when no one is around. (Never leave a burning candle unattended.)
This candle is a small gesture to the Gods in thanks for all the blessings they provide. Since starting this ritual, I have noticed even more blessings occurring in my life.
The nice thing about this ritual is that it doesn’t take much time and it doesn’t require a big fanfare. As long as your ritual is heartfelt and sincere the Gods will be pleased.
If you live with someone who isn’t Wiccan, lighting a candle in not a big inconvenience. Simply let them know that this is a positive part of your daily life.
This ritual is a great way to say “I noticed” and “thanks” to the Gods. They will appreciate it. This ritual also helps you be happier and healthier.
Please leave a comment and let me know if you do something like this or if you have a different way to honor the blessings in your life. I’d love to hear your perspective. Thanks.
Today is The Hidden Children of the Goddess’s one year anniversary. Hooray! To celebrate, I will give you a free excerpt of the new book. Email me at AskAWitchNow @ gmail.com for a small excerpt of my upcoming new workbook from my new workshop: Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magick.
Today’s post is on one of the most important things the Gods have taught me. Learning Self-Love. If we don’t have self-love we can’t have hope for ourselves and for others.
Learning Self-Love
How do you feel? Do feel good about yourself and how your life is going? In our society, many of us struggle with the concept of self-love. Some people even confuse self-love with being self-centered.
Self-love is about taking care of yourself and making sure that you are strong. Without self-love you can’t manifest your desires.
I did not start with self-love. Due to my brother’s physical abuse and my parents’ neglect, I felt worthless. Fortunately, the Gods changed my perspective on myself for the better.
Through reflective meditation, the Gods helped me understand how skewed my perception of myself really was. This was a key turning point for me.
One thing you always hear about are affirmations, but for many of us these just don’t work.
First, let’s cover what an affirmation is. It’s a personal, positive statement. It can be as simple as “I feel terrific” or “I make a lot of money.”
For many, the above statements don’t work. Why?
A number of people have told, “It just sounds like I’m lying to myself.”
Like myself, many people’s inner self-beliefs interfere with these positive statements. For an example, if I used the affirmation “I am thin, ” my brain would object with “No, I’m not. Look in the mirror”. It’s not true. No matter how hard you try to pound that new idea into your brain, your brain pounds just as hard back.
So how did the Gods help me deal with this problem? They inspired me to create a Self-Love Meditation.
So instead of the uphill battle of an affirmation, we’ll use the Self-Love Meditation to work with the situation.
[You can work with this meditation by audio recording it in your own voice and then play it back. Or you invite a friend to read this section to you.]
Self-Love Meditation
Close your eyes.
Breathe in and out deeply . . . Relax.
Keep breathing.
Breathe out the stress of the day.
Breathe in relaxation and peace.
(Pause)
You are still aware of the light that is in the room.
Now the light begins to fade.
As it fades you feel total comfort. You feel safe and secure in the darkness.
(Short Pause)
Now, a new form of light blossoms. It surrounds and wraps you in its loving energy. This light is the light of the Gods.
It is a light of love and compassion. Take it in.
As you take this light and understanding in, you can now see with the Gods’ eyes.
You can now see yourself as they see you, pure, beautiful, whole. You are a masterpiece of their creation. You were made with love, and you are a manifestation of their love. You are love.
This understanding fills you.
(Pause)
With this new understanding you are now ready to return to the physical world.
You know that even though you may leave the light at this time it is never truly gone.
It’s a gentle transition as the light begins to fade around you.
Slowly at first. It gets darker and darker.
As it fades you feel total comfort. You feel safe and secure in the darkness.
(Short Pause)
Then a familiar light returns, the light in the room where you started.
It gradually gets brighter and brighter.
You are back in the room. You have brought the calm and peace and happy feelings back with you.
Now, gently open your eyes.
You can do this meditation as often as you need to. It may not take at first, but keep trying. Eventually the Gods’ light will shine within you.
I keep this light within me at all times. Sometimes it’s hard to see it, but it is always there. With self-love we can manifest anything we wish. From the foundation of self-love, we have the energy and personal peace from which we can help others on their path.
I would love to hear about your experience with this meditation. You can leave a comment in the comment box below.
Do you believe in the Law of Three? Have you done something and had the same energy return upon you three-fold?
I have personally seen Law of Three results unfold in my daily life. My actions do bring things in response that are similar in tone.
Do we always get exactly three times the response to an action? Not necessarily.
Imagine that you remove a log from your yard. Likely, some little creatures live in that log. Now homeless, they must find a new place to live. Most often, this might be a small situation.
But what if they were termites and their new home is your house?!
So a small action (removing the log) led to a big reaction (termite damage). Perhaps, needing to have your home repaired causes you stress.
And in this above example, we see that one action may be magnified. How much depends
on many variables and how a particular action effects the universe.
So why is it called The Law of Three if it doesn’t effect us exactly three times? In short, I don’t know. Perhaps, three was chosen because it is a sacred number. It sounds better than The Law of Two.
I’d suggest that The Law of Three really reminds us that one action can create a magnified reaction that effects you.
Say no to racism
Crystal Blanton
This is a public service announcement from Crystal Blaton and I think it is very important for people in the Craft to stand up to the sickness that is Racism.
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: My dear Pagan people… Racism is a cancer in our society. It has killed for generations and the only cure known to man is education. And that still is not 100% effective, many people will continue to die from racism, and many people will die racist.
And so we MUST remember that there is NO PLACE for racism in our spiritual community. It doesn’t matter what branch of Paganism, what label or term that is used. It is not acceptable, nor should it ever be acceptable.
All people should feel safe to walk with the Gods. All people should feel safe to engage in community, and all people have the right to connect with divinity. My brand of Paganism does not include those [racist] beliefs and I will continue to demand a safe environment for all people, and especially for people of color, to be free of bullshit separatist language, rhetoric and ridicule.
Cancer silently kills people everyday. My aunt died from cancer right before my eyes. Racism also kills people silently (and sometimes not so silently). I have also lost many people from this silent but deadly killer. It must stop…. and we are the only means to a cure.
It starts with us. IT MUST START WITH US!
Eliminating racism begins with acknowledging that it is still here. For over 13 years, I live with my sweetheart, and he is a person of color. He has seen the trouble caused by racism and negativity.
I find it synchronistic that I wrote about The Law of Three and Crystal wrote about eliminating racism.
If you have a personal story about The Law of Three I would love to hear about your experience. You can reply in the comments box below. Thanks!
When I came to the Craft, I was relieved about how Wicca viewed the body. In Wicca, it doesn’t matter if you’re trim or voluptuous. Or if your body has a pear shape or no shape. Wicca sees all body types as sacred. Let’s face it, not everyone can be a supermodel. But just because you may not have all the “right” curves in all the right places doesn’t mean you aren’t beautiful in the eyes of the Gods. Because all body types are sacred to the Gods. And in Wicca, no one body type is better than another. Another thing, it doesn’t matter if you’re black, white, brown, or even purple. We are all beloved of the Gods.
Wiccans see the Gods in our bodies. The Gods take form in bodies just as they take form in rocks and trees around us. Because of this we need to take care of our bodies. For they are our temples. We need to feed them good food, take care of them by washing them clean, and take them out for a spin, even if it is just around the block once a day. You don’t need to be a health freak to successfully maintain your body, but if you happen to be one that’s okay, too. I won’t tell.
Why is this so important? Healthy bodies help us do what we need to do in our magickal lives. When we take care of our bodies our bodies help us in return. Not only are they a physical manifestation of the God and Goddess, but they help us raise energy for spells. And our bodies help us interact with the world around us.
When’s the last time you lit a candle without the help of your body? I’d like to light a candle with just pure thought. (It hasn’t happened yet.) I need my hands to light a candle, whether I use a match or the sacred bic!
Having a healthy body is important to our magick and in honoring the Gods. As I mentioned, our body is our temple. Would you want to go to a smelly, run down and un-landscaped temple to worship in? I wouldn’t want to worship there and I suspect neither would the Gods. This is why it is important to keep up your temple.
Keep your temple clean. Decorate it appropriately. For example, wear clothes that fit. You don’t have to pick the latest designer clothing. Pick something you are happy with. Find your own style. You want people to see your temple and see you as the beautiful and unique person you truly are. Have an interesting body shape? Express it. Be proud of what the Gods gave you. Never hide in shame over what you look like. The Gods gave us bodies for our happiness and for enjoying the world around us.
Do you have witchy fashion tips or ideas you wish to share? Use the comment box below to let us know about your inner diva.
Blessed be,
Moonwater
Real Magick Workshop
Take Advantage of the Early
Registration Discount
Release anything that blocks you from the financial abundance and happiness you really want! In this hands-on workshop we will be focusing on prosperity magick. However, this workshop can be used to unblock anything you may have that is hindering your magick from coming to full fruition. This workshop is three hours long (3pm to 6pm on October 19th) and will be held in San Jose, California, USA. This workshop includes meditation and actual practicies for attracting the life you truly desire.
Early Registration (August 25th – September 9th) is only $19.95
Regular Registration (September 10th – October 18th) $29.95
At the Door (If seating is still available) $35.00
If you are interested in going to the workshop please contact me now at:
AskAWitchNow@Gmail.com
If you know someplace to advertise the workshop I would appreciate it. Click here to get the pdf: Real Magick Workshop
We’ve all been in a bad relationship at some time in our lives. Whether it is a family problem or ex-lovers or a friendship that just plain went sour. So how do we spiritually separate ourselves from these poisonous people?
You can use many different ways to accomplish this. However, the first and foremost thing to do is to verbally end the relationship. You might say something like: “I don’t think this is healthy for us. So let’s just stop seeing each other.”
Second, physically stay away from the person. The idea is to stop spiritually ingesting the poison of interacting with them.
Many people hesitate to do the first two steps. For many, true change is quite difficult. I can relate to this. And, I’m providing the below ritual for when you’re truly ready to move on with your life.
Now, it’s time to use what I call the Separation Ritual. This ritual involves disconnecting the astral connections that you and the person made during the relationship.
Unless you take action, you stay connected to the person. How? Your astral bodies remain connected. Negative energy can still be transferred both ways. To protect yourself from these bad energies you must cut all ties from that person. This is where the Separation Ritual comes in.
Ideally, the person would participate in a Separation Ritual with you. That often does not happen. So you take an object that will stand in for the person. This object could be a picture or even a teddy bear, if the person likes teddy bears.
Use a length of yarn or piece of red string, which represents the connections you have between you and the toxic person. Red is for the life force but you can uses another color if you think that would be a better representation.
For this ritual you’ll need both your athame (to cast your circle) and a boline, which is a white handle knife used specifically for cutting physical objects during ritual.
Important: Athames are used to cut energy. Bolines are used to cut physical objects.
Here are the steps of True Separation:
Verbally end the relationship
Stay away from the person.
Ground yourself.
Cast circle.
Do the Separation Ritual (see below).
Do the Cakes and Wine ritual.
Close the circle.
Finally continue to have no contact with the toxic person.
You will need your usual ritual items to cast circle and your altar. As I mentioned you will also have a length of yarn or piece of red string. The yarn/string must be long enough to encircle your own waist and to encircle the object (that represents the toxic person).
The Separation Ritual
Take the object. First, your will asperge it. Asperge means to sprinkle the holy water with your fingers onto the object.
With the holy water, asperge and say:
I cleanse and consecrate you by water and earth.
Next you will cense the object. Cense means to waft incense smoke over the object.
With the incense smoke, cense and say:
I bless and charge you with air and fire.
Then take the string/yarn and cense and asperge it as well and say:
I cleanse and consecrate you by water and earth.
I bless and charge you with air and fire.
Take the red string/yarn in your hands saying:
Tiny bundle of String/yarn
You are now the same as the bonds between me and Name of person.
Tie one end of the string/yarn to the object and then encircle your waist with the other end of the string/yarn, while you say:
You are the bonds that connect us now.
From me to Name of person and from Name of person to me.
Our connection is by thee.
Sit and concentrate on the bond between you both and see it as the string/yarn that now connects you and the object. Once you have a firm connection with that thought, take the boline and cut the string/yarn, seeing in your mind’s eye the astral bonds being cut along with the string/yarn.
Once you complete the cut, say:
I am now free of the ties of Name of person as he/she is of me.
May my happiness expand, and may Name of person’s happiness expand.
Blessed be.
Finish up with the cakes and wine part of the ritual and then close the circle.
And you’re done.
Separating ourselves from toxic people is important for our happiness and well being. It even blesses the life of the other person. You are doing yourself and the other person a favor.
I trust that this ritual will help you be happier and healthier.
We all deal with stress in our lives. However, members of a minority religion face additional stressors. Many Wiccans and Pagans in general have experienced some form of prejudice and some have even been the victims of hate crimes. These and other terrible acts upon us can really take a toll.
Although I am fortunate to live in the San Francisco Bay Area where there is more acceptance of people with differences, I have still faced prejudice. I have lost friendships and suffered the actions of intolerant people.
So how can we combat the stresses of such actions?
First, assess the situation. Can you educate the offending person? I have been in situations when the offending person thinks he’s right and will hear nothing that differs from his beliefs.
Make sure no one is being harmed. There is a big difference between offensive words and physical violence. One may need to take action. Maybe you need to quickly get to a place of safety. One might even have to call 911 for police intervention.
Take care of your own feelings. Before I get caught up in an aggression tornado, I remember to simply breathe. Concentrating on your breath is a great way to help yourself calm down. Then you can take control of the words that come out of your mouth. You can’t control what they say, but you can control what you say and do.
Find your way to compassion. The Gods and Goddesses love their children (all of them) so become the Goddess in her nurturing state. Let her energy flow within you. Let the Goddess help you select your words. Avoid words that sting, instead say something constructive and nurturing to the conversation. How would this sound? One way to respond is: “I heard what you said. That’s not what my life is about. I’m leaving this room.”
When I say compassion, I do not mean let them walk all over you. The idea is to make space in yourself to understand those who are ignorant of your beliefs. They don’t know what they are talking about. To take their words personally gives them power. Do not let that happen. Do not give these untruths any power.
Renew yourself. Once the incident is over, take some time to do a Breathing Meditation. I know how much it helps as a salve to the wounds their words have left.
Find a quiet place where you know you will not be disturbed. Silence your cell phone or home phone. Get comfortable and relax. You can burn some of your favorite incense and light a candle. I find dimming the lights to be helpful.
Here is the process:
As you relax, close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. Breathing in and out deeply, envision a beautiful white light shinning down and surrounding you. Next, deeply breathe in that light, pulling in the beautiful cleansing properties of it. Hold this breath for the count of three.
When you breathe out, picture a black smoke made of those toxic words, actions and emotions. You expel the black smoke from your body. Imagine the black smoke absorbed and purified by the light around you. After your exhalation, hold your breath for a count of three. This is where you acknowledge the transformation of energy.
Continue this process until you feel you have expelled all of the negative comments/feelings/energies that were placed upon you. Finish this meditation by thanking the Gods for their shinning light.
May this meditation renew you and free you of any negative effects created by prejudice.
Once free of toxins, you can experience the blessings of life with the Gods and Goddesses.
GoddessHasYourBack.com 