“Sometimes, it just gets to be too much to bear, you know?” Merla said. At PantheaCon, we were taking a break. She told me about how she still had to hide her pentagram necklace at family gatherings. Her family held to a strict Christian point of view. If they knew her Pagan faith, she’d be denounced and disowned.
“I could put up with losing some family members. Hell, if my father never talked to me again, that would be a relief. But losing my baby sister. That would hurt. Really bad.”
I listened closely. I kept quiet mostly so that Merla could talk herself out. Merla feared losing all contact with her sister. I could relate to fear.
Have you noticed how fear can keep us stuck?
Will Merla ever come out to her family? Is her relationship with her sister strong enough so she could come out just to her sister?
These are tough questions. Maybe not coming out to her family is the right decision for Merla. I don’t know.
I do know that if you run your whole life by fear, it can really screw you up.
In my own journey, moving through fear has been truly important. Recently, I gave a speech. Here is the text of that speech:
* * * * * *
“Have you ever been so scared that fear stopped you cold?
I have!
At 15 years old, I wanted to be a writer, but I had dyslexia.
Writing scared me.
Why? Because I never had regular English classes. I was in the Special Ed group. I never learned how to break down a sentence. Or to write a “proper paragraph.”
Writing scared me. So I shut down for over 20 years and didn’t do my dream.
I have 3 Big Ideas to share with you tonight.
The first one is: “You don’t have to believe. You just have to act.”
Let me share how this worked in my life. I have a friend who knew an Acquisitions Editor at a top publishing company. I knew the books that came from this publisher. I really wanted to write for this publisher.
This is the dream for a wannabe writer like me. The one big opportunity. So I went to their website to find out what I needed to submit to the publisher. Under the tab “submissions” it said that I had to submit a complete manuscript of the book.
Write a whole book?! Are you crazy? I can’t even write a paragraph.
But then I had an idea. “Just one step.” Did I believe I could write a book. No. What could I do? One step. Write a paragraph. Another step. Write a second paragraph. Then, write a short blog post. One more step. Write a second blog post for the second week of the blog.
One year later. 52 blog posts done. Now, I had most of the material for a book.
What did I learn? “JUST ONE STEP.” Just one step at a time is all I needed.
You don’t have to believe; you just have to act.
Here’s my 2nd Big Idea for you tonight.
I have dyslexia. Can I polish my writing on my own?
No.
So I came up with this idea–my 3rd idea for you tonight: The Power of Me Expands to the Power of We.
In my case, “We” means that I write the first draft. It’s all my ideas, my content—what comes from my heart.
Then I bring in my editor. Then I had other team members like a fact checker and a proofreader. So let’s go over those Big Ideas:
1) JUST ONE STEP and
2) The Power of ME expands to the Power of WE.
Now, I invite you to think of something you want. Something you want to try. Something you want to experience. Think of One Step in the direction of what you want.
Yes—Doing a Google Search counts!
JUST ONE STEP.
Say that with me now. All together: JUST … ONE … STEP …
I know this works. I’m living proof. The dyslexic who has written 4 books.
And let’s all remember: “The Power of ME expands to The Power of WE.”
Look around. We’re all gathered tonight. We’re supporting each other. During the networking time, you could meet someone who can help you – and you could help that person in return.
What is possible? More than you think. Remember: Just One Step and the Power of WE.
Thank you.”
* * * * * *
In my above speech, I talked about how I dealt with fear by taking small steps forward.
In your spiritual path, what small steps can you take forward? Do you wish to connect with more Pagans? You might go to Cog.org [website of Covenant of the Goddess].
Another valuable website is witchvox.com
You could also connect with me at askawitchnow@gmail.com
If you can find your way to California, usually in February, you can attend PantheaCon.
I invite you to find other Pagans and build your own circle of support.
Blessed Be,
Moonwater
P.S. To sign up for our E-Newsletter click here.
Looking for gifts?
See my designs at Redbubble. For more of Moonwater SilverClaw, consider some of her books:
Goddess Has Your Back: How Wicca Can Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem and Make Your Life Magickal
Goddess Walks Beside You: How You Can Listen, Learn and Enjoy the Wiccan Path
GoddessHasYourBack.com 
Thank you for this article…it couldn’t have come at a better time for me. I was a practicing Witch for 1.5 years…and then came the remaking of me. I didn’t know about this at that time because I’m self trained and apparently missed that lesson! It horrified me so bad I stopped practicing for a year thinking I’d unleashed some inner demon! And I’ll admit, even though I’ve read a lot more and understand Paganism and it’s various effects on the practitioner better now, I’m still scared. I’ve been reluctant to do more than meditate and read and practice with my Oracle cards. I’ve cast a few circles (thank you for explaining how to do it right in Hidden Children!), but while I want to do spell work for prosperity to help take care of my 2 kids and myself I’m terrified to open those flood gates. And its double hard because at night my kids are home and I can’t just abandon them for an hour for mommy to play lol! Every night I wake up at 11:30. For MONTHS!!! I feel the goddess is waking me to do my work but again I’ve been to afraid. This article reminded me of what I already knew but had forgotten. Thank you so very much! Blessings, Obsydian
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Obsydian, I am happy that things are going better for you. You can always ask me questions if you need help. I am also on Facebook if you want to chat.
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