The video camera “record light” glowed red, and I asked the notable witch a powerful question: What has changed in your belief system from when you started?
This question resonated in my thoughts. When I first started my practice of Wicca, I read that the Gods were everywhere. I just went along with that but I didn’t function on the level of really knowing this.
I didn’t intend to fall into a pattern of looking upon the authors as all knowing priests, telling me what to think and how to worship. (Even if the authors did not mean to “preach,” I took their words in that way.) This is not the spirit of the Craft. If you want to be told what to do and how to do it for your spiritual path, go to certain churches, synagogues or other places of worship.
Wicca is something different. Because I lacked experience, my perception of the Craft was off. As I mentioned, the authors seemed liked preachers to me. The Craft is not a faith of listening to someone standing at a pulpit and following what they say.
But when I first started out I treated my practice of Wicca like that. I lacked the understanding and more importantly, knowing the Gods. Once I met the Gods, my understanding became a knowing in my heart what the Craft is really about.
Instead of looking outward toward Deity, which is what many of the mainstream religions do, I looked within. I found a new world to explore. Looking within, I could no longer deny that my thoughts of inferiority and self-loathing were not the truth of the Gods. Such thoughts of self-loathing were the fruit of abuse and my frightened ego.
The experience of meeting the Gods during my meditation gave me a whole new sight. This sight was of the love and compassion of the Gods. I saw myself as They see me: a creation of beauty.
The Gods communicated to me specifically that They crafted all Their children with love, respect and reverence. So much so that They put themselves into each one of us.
Since that time, I have grown with the knowing that Deity is within and throughout the world around us.
Some might suggest that this insight is a “no-brainer,” but the truth is: I really needed to learn this firsthand through interacting with the Gods.
Just reading or listening to others tell me about this insight was not enough. I needed to experience the real teaching moment for me.
Now I look within to hear the Gods and look outside me to see the signs from the Gods. I have a personalized relationship with the Goddess and God. They are my friends and confidants. They lead me and guide me through my everyday life, including crucial times of hardship.
My journey has also included starting as a solitary witch and then joining a coven.
Like many people I started by reading books. At the time, I couldn’t find a mentor and I wanted to have the right mentor. So I asked the Gods for Their help. They responded, “… when you’re ready.”
So I stayed on the solitary path for many years—reading many books and practicing the Craft as well as I could.
Finally, my first mentor arrived in my life. The Gods were right. I had finally had enough knowledge so that I was able to more fully appreciate my first mentor’s guidance.
Through my first mentor, I had my first experiences as a member of a coven. It was nice to turn to someone who had the experience I lacked. My mentor would steer me on the safest and fastest path that was right for me. All along the way I still talked to the Gods and worked with Them to tailor the lessons of my journey.
To this day, I still ask my mentors for their guidance.
P.S. I expect to continue creating video interviews of notable Wiccan elders. If you have a question that you’d like to ask me or another Wiccan elder, please place such a question in the comments section. Thank you.
For more of Moonwater SilverClaw, consider some of her books:
Goddess Has Your Back: How Wicca Can Help You Raise Your Self-Esteem and Make Your Life Magickal
The Hidden Children of the Goddess Embrace Wicca, Become Strong, Be at Peace with Yourself and the World Around You
Beyond the Law of Attraction to Real Magic: How You Can Remove Blocks to Prosperity, Happiness and Inner Peace
3 thoughts on “Changing and Growing on my Path”
How do you feel the gods when everything seems to be going wrong? I’ve recently been through trauma after trauma until I was on my knees begging the gods to cut me some slack. They did not. I understand their plan now as things start to come together, but I felt my faith faltering.
Tara, you raise a tough and important question: “How do you feel the Gods when everything seems to be going wrong?”
I am with you about this. Because of dealing with symptoms of depression, I have endured many times when I have felt alone and desperately in pain. All I wanted was for the pain to stop. As I have written, I have survived after my attempts at suicide.
What helped me is to learn about listening within. Many people have a hard time because of all the chatter in their minds. This is why meditation to me is so helpful. It quiets the mind and helps you hear the Gods.
Sometimes it’s hard to travel the path. It may go through brambles and other difficult terrain. Sometimes all we want to do is stop. But the path’s difficulties are there for a reason. This reason is: the Gods want us to grow.
Using meditation can help you quiet the mind to hear the Gods. They are whispering clues of how to get around obstacles or simply how to survive the path itself. They are rooting for us. And They know it’s hard.
Looking for signs around us in daily life is another way we can notice how the Gods are communicating to us. We just need to look for the signs. What are these signs? Each person has her own unique path and the language of signs (including images) vary from person to person.
I’ll share an example. I like domesticated pet rats. If I see a sign (picture or someone mentions their pet rat), I experience a completely different feeling than someone who grew up in New York impacted by wild rats.
So how can you know if something you see or hear is a sign for you? First, is the message somehow repeated? I have a friend who experienced three people all recommending the same book. To him, it felt like “Higher Power” (his word) was talking to him: “Read this book, already!”
Finally, about “How do you feel the Gods when everything seems to be going wrong?” – please realize that guidance from the Gods often does not arrive as fast (or in the way) we prefer. Keep returning to meditating. Keep taking care of yourself (enough sleep, good nutrition, exercise) – so you can be alert for the signs from the Gods.
Thank you, Moonwater. My sign is dimes. They appear out of nowhere and let me know I’m not alone. I’m glad you brought up signs. Sometimes I forget. ((Hugs))